okay. im gg to spend at least 30mins to blog and update my life!

im kinda of stress with school stuff. and i skipped my lecture and tut today. Reason very simple: i need a break!. i just wanan escape from school and relax myself. school ish super duper fast-pace, i everyday see those working adults fly here and there, push here and there-> it makes me stress. Okay, i dont mean that kinda of stress but seriously I DONT LIKE IT. the up-coming weeks is gg be terrible for me. I REALLY CANT COPE IT. trust me. I CANT cope it. okay, despite saying so, the only thing i can do is to trust god. I dont wanan rely on my own strength anymore. i cant go ON by keep telling me amanda u can do it amanda u can do it. BUT GOD, i need you.

Just gt home; met up XIAO YING to pass her back her blazzar. WOW xiao ying change a lot! she used to be VERY 'SANG' n talk so loud like nobody biz..somehow somewhat..shes so gentle now..HEH. Talk to her for a while..she was sharing with me abt her current life..nice catch up hur :X

okay; ben the cow LOVES to tease me by asking me "u haven backslide?" okay, to some it might seems offensive? i dont noe? but somewhat i think both of us communicate this way. HAHAHA. anyway, i nv tot of backsliding LA! yes; im really stress abt my school stuff. infact, i can chose to backslide and spending more time for my academic instead of dd what im dd right now. BUT HEY. i wont. i promised. i will hold on to him. yupyup. i think life is more den just sticking butts on the chair and MUGGGGGGGGGGG. =)

the way jenny talks to me like "old friend"-> very straight forward and get to the point and nv give me time to prepare my heart. Okay, she was like telling me..okay put it simply..I got another sheep!!!. arr hur..im not ready yet. and gosh. Okay, im pretty frank..initially, im really really kinda of pushing it away. But, ltr on somehow, im willing le.

Tot now im a leader, im still really v scared, those really close to me knows my character. im fearful kinda of pple..im really scared at times. There are times, like some of u..wanna run away..dont feel like doing it-DONT DO LOR or just give some excuess or saying "give me more time and i'll grow".

BUT for my case; i feel like running away, AND everytime i got such Thougts; GOD just GRAB MY NECK and put me in that situation which i ald plan to run away AND he just PUSH Me OUT OF MY COMFORT ZONE and struck my heart with this verse: Phi 4:13 "i can do everything through him who gives me strength"

GOD strength is sufficient to DO EVERYTHING!! and god keep reminding me;" its not cos by ur strength u can do it, but its thru me who give u strength and THEREFORE u CAN DO EVERYTHING. "stop relying on urself, im here!! rely on me"- god always tell me this.

right now, im leading BIZART3b! two sheeps. Its souls; its lifes that im talking about. That night; karen told me "i'll follow where you leads", and it sort of reminding me thaat i need to do sth. HAHA. well well. whatever i do, or whatever decision i make..i dont do it rushly or "anything" anymore. Its beyond that; i need to think abt my sheeps; my pple that god entrusted to me..and lastly the very last pple that i will think of ish myself. i think thats e changed in me ever since i came back to god.

just now; i received a message from jasmine; im really happy for her that right now shes leading her CG of her own in her church! jia you girl, really thank god for you!!
just wanna shared what she said;

"its about GOD's covenant with us. think about it- a marriage cert is just a piece of paper in law. But does all e conditions in it explain what a marriage is all about? in the same light, e laws in e books in e bible do not, and can never fully explain God's covenantal love for us. It takes relationship btw him and ourselves to experience of what it is, in a deeper and richer sense. our service to god is an overflow of our relationship with him. "

I hope it would refresh your spiritual life! its true; its not about gg to service everyweek or gg to cg..leaders says this and that..do this and that..BUT its abt experiencing GOD.

Being a leader; i dont to serve god like a "task" thingy rather den truely experiencing GOD anymore!. for the first..two week of my DMM's meetings, i tend to fall in the situation of a "task" thing. i feel more like a middleman of communicating it to my pple. I DONT WANN THAT. i wanna to lead the cg tog with the holy spirit and my support CT. =)

okay apparently; im such person. when it comes to PEOPLE related stuff; i tend to beat around the bushh, HAHA. but when it comes to Task related stuff; i tend to get straight to the point; i dont like to beat around the bushh. I just wanan get things right, no misunderstanding and there it goes.

Cliquiee; im so sorry for neglecting ya guys. i'll promised i will leave 3days in e oct holidays just for you guys. =)

thank god for jas n eileen; i know u guys cares for me. heh no worries? yeaa
jia you for the up-coming BUUUSEE test, OPERA test, MOCK test, INTRO INTEVIEW and BUSSSE assignment. heh

orrh yea; my beloved TAOPOK karen was trying to help me to curb e temptation of BUBBLE TEA. okay, im serious abt fasting from BUBBLE tea, OPPS, tot i having it right. BUT; starting from today onwards, I shall pray and fast! i have been drinking it almost everyday..and i know its bad? HAHHAAHAHAHA. okay.

BIZART3b lets start to fast and pray to see salvations coming in.!